I went to RHS Chelsea today and I was wondering how many words about it will be written over the next few day. I thought I’d be as brief as possible – so here’s my Chelsea in 100 words, starting with the most common place and working down to the rare.
Cow parsley (in its smart forms Ammi majus & Anthriscus), Iris, Cameras, black Aqueligia, Cirsium, high-heeled shoes, Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen (I can only assumed he’s been cloned) Foxgloves, Stipa, Roses & Clematis in the marquee but not the gardens, officials in high-vis jackets (hot, officious, bad tempered), Deschampsia, Kiosks selling garden knick knacks, Alchemilla, Orlaya grandiflora, Anchusa, the dripping kind of water feature, Sweaty hands and red faces (as the blistering day burnt ever on), Verbascum, the bubbling kind of water feature, other kiosks selling food & drink, Trollius, Lupins, Alliums (of course), Topiary Box, Buttercups, Alan Titchmarsh (- there’s only one).
Now you can imagine it all and have no need to go. Stay at home in the cool.